Life at Gray Gables: 19: Teach your child one thing they can do on his own

Thursday, November 20, 2014

19: Teach your child one thing they can do on his own

"A child can teach an adult 3 things: to be happy for no reason, to always be busy with something, and to know how to demand with all his might that which he desires."

Paulo Coelho

Today is the perfect day for this challenge. I have a five year old in Kindergarten who is going through a lot right now. She sits at a table with a bothersome little boy who is giving her all kinds of trouble.

It is a life lesson.

We have dealt with bullying all through the year so far, which is pretty astonishing considering that this is Kindergarten. But, this boy is taking her things, closing her locker on her, grabbing her and pushing her, taking her papers and calling her names. FUN for a MOM to listen to, right! The icing on the cake is that the last time we were having physical issues with a different student, I went to the Teacher, who was kind of hurt that my kiddo did not go to her about the issues. She was not even aware.

So, I am trying to get my child to go to her teacher, on her own, to deal with this little boy, who sits next to her everyday. You would think this would be easy, but my child is a teacher-pleaser. She is scared to "Tell" on this boy. I asked her if she used the STOP, WALK AWAY then TELL method. She said that she has told him to STOP and walked away so far but she doesn't want to be a Tattle Tale.

Oh my, this is so frustrating for me. I can't fight her battles for her and as sad as it sounds, since this is happening so often in Kindergarten, I have to help her to understand that IT'S OK! Go to your Teacher, tell her you don't want to be a Tattle Tale but you told him to STOP and you walked away and nothing is working...it is actually getting worse as each day passes.

This is when I wish I home schooled. I see these kids taking pieces of my awesome personality kiddo away and it is starting to show. I am trying hard not to panic, to try to be positive and reassure her that "boys will be boys" or that maybe "he likes you." It doesn't make it any better though.

But, at the end of the day, I understand that no matter how hard is if on me, and harder on her...she has to do this on her own or she will always run to me with every little problem and expect me to fix it for her.